Saturday, January 31, 2009

Laughable Douche Bag

I had a guy almost start a fight with me last night. Here's the thing, he was so drunk that I politely agreed with him about some band he was talking about, yet he acted like we were having a fight. It was so funny. And nobody around me was paying attention to enjoy it. We were standing in a bar line at the Blue Post when we had this conversation:

Guy: Did you know Reggie's tavern quit selling PBR?

Me: No. I don't go up there much. Last time I went there was to see ASG and some other band. I don't know much about ASG, but I grew up in a small town with the singer. He's a cool dude, so I went to finally check him out. They were good.

Guy: That other band was Silver Judas. They're even better than ASG.

Me: Oh, that was Silver Judas? Yeah, they were good. I wrote an article on them once. Nice guys, they even sent me a thank you note. That was cool of them, nobody does that. I didn't realize that was them. It was all done over the phone.

Guy: Silver Judas is better than ASG.

Me: Umm, sure. Yeah, they're good.

Guy: No, you're wrong; they're not good. They're great!

Me: Oh, ok. They're great.

Guy: (Now edging up in my face a little.) I don't think you understand. Silver Judas is the best band ever! I'm personal friends with them.

Me: Oh, ok. I'll have to go see them again then. They sound awesome.

Guy: (Now really in my face.) No! You're wrong. They're not awesome! They are a full-on experience!

Me: OK, they're great. I believe you. I'm sure they rule.

Guy: (About to hit me any second now, I was sure.) NO! I DIDN'T SAY THEY RULE! I SAID THEY ARE A FULL-ON EXPERIENCE!

Me: (Trying to squeeze by this guy who didn't want to let me leave.) You got it dude - "Full on experience." Speaking of full on experience, my bladder is having a full on experience, I better hit the wizzer.-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of conversation.

I didn't really have to pee, I just didn't want to get in a fist-fight over a subject I really had no concern about. As I squeezed by this guy who was certainly about to hit me for politely agreeing with him, I headed to the bathroom, and I turned around once and realized he was glaring at me the whole way, like we had just had an argument. But we hadn't had an argument, he spoke passionately about something I didn't give a shit about, and I went along with it to keep peace. What the hell? That guy should give up drinking and take up drugs. Douche bag. Laughable douchebag.

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